Just Another Woo Girl
Just Another Woo Girl
Lol. I wake up at 11 and played around on my phone until I see my mum call me, see, because my phone is on silent. I thought she was calling from work to say she was working till 3, unluckily not. She called to say her friends and her are at Paul’s Warehouse and do I want to come and look at shoes. Not really. To make matters worse, she’s bringing her friends around afterwards to, I don’t know, drink tea and eat dried fruits.
So now I’m already awake at 11:30am, I’ve made breakfast and ran it up to my room to eat like a hermit. Well rather this than have to actually put a bra on and a kind morning face and greet them… Yeah…
Less than 24 hours, well actually I only have the rest of today until I go to sleep to figure out what subjects I want to do in first (and maybe second) semester… It basically determines the major anyway. Sigh pie. Enrolment tomorrow… Also my dad is a psycho but I can’t be bothered explaining.
Just Another Woo Girl
My parents have been talking about getting a new toilet seat for a while now, and finally, I suppose my dad cracked and decided he would go out on his lunch break or something and buy a new toilet seat. (Other scenario, both, my mum and dad decided on getting a toilet). Anyway, whatever the series of events that led up to this fateful decision has left me, having to go downstairs to go to the toilet now. No matter the time, not matter the darkness, I cannot, will not, relieve myself in this creepy, disgusting, pregnant toilet.
Maybe it was my mistake, my dad asked me to come out of my hermit shell, otherwise known as bedroom, to look at this new toilet seat he’d gotten. To my surprise, he had not gotten it to replace the shitty plastic one downstairs, but the actually ceramic one upstairs. Another thing I might add is that I never use to the downstairs bathroom, it’s quite heritage, or as I will describe it as, old. I was watching the latest episode of The Big Bang Theory so I gave it a miss, thinking, (foolishly), it’s a toilet seat? What could possibly be wrong with it? Toilet seats really only come in ceramic and wooden designs, so that would make risk of cringe-worthiness, almost 0%.
Oh, how, ever, was I wrong. After finishing the episode, I went out into the light, of the corridor and headed down the hall to see the toilet seat. I looked at it from the door, my dad had just finished installing it.
“Looks the same,” was my response.
Funnily, my dad pointed out nonchalantly, “No it’s not, the connecting part is metal, that’s different.”
Okay whatever, I go downstairs, go about my business, have dinner, and now comes the time in which I need to use the portal to the sewers. I ask my dad if I can use it yet, he says yes. I head upstairs to the bathroom. I lift up the lid, and to my extreme mortifying horror, there is a fucking baby toilet seat stuck underneath the actual toilet seat…WHAT THE FUCK?! Okay, my reaction wasn’t that big at first, I thought, oh, the toilet seat is stuck under the lid, then I realised, no, there’s already a toilet seat on the toilet…THEN WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!?! Oh the horror, oh the extreme mortification, I wanted to cringe and possibly endure a seizure-ous attack on the ground but I didn’t want to have my head anything near this creepy monstrosity.
Just so you better understand what the toilet lid looks like, it’s like the toilet seat lid has been spooned out so that there is space to fit, a mini toilet seat, that I thought must be for babies, because it looks like one of the add-ons. I would show you a picture, but I’ve only seen the toilet once, and haven’t been there since 6 hours ago and don’t ever plan to, in my life, go in there again, when that creepy ass fuck toilet seat is in there.
I went downstairs to tell my dad, that THIS IS NOT ALRIGHT! THE TOILET IS NOT ALRIGHT!!! I will seriously not go to the toilet when the freaky miniature toilet seat is facing the back of me, possibly could fall and touch me, EWWW!!! I asked him directly, “What is it?!” He replies, “It’s good.” I ask him if it’s a fucking baby seat, and various other objections, and he continues to answer with the same thing, “It’s good.”
Well fuck this shit I’m not going to use that toilet ever again.
Anyway, I tell my mum, and at first she’s like, in her mind (I can tell from her face), uh oh, what has he bought. She obviously didn’t know that he’d bought this devilish thing. She went upstairs to check it out, and came back down not objecting to its freakishness at all! Saying, he didn’t know, that we can’t return it, that he’s thrown away all the packaging.
Firstly, he obviously did know, because if that’s not the reason he bought it, he would’ve seen it whilst installing it. And she’s probably right, he can’t return it, because he fucking wanted to buy that toilet seat.
Anyway, long story medium length, he also bought a new shower head which I was looking forward to enjoying, and apparently got a $64 toilet cover… I have not seen either. And don’t plan to. Though I’m sad I don’t get to use the shower. Oh yes, he also admitted that the freaky baby toilet seat, is actually a male toilet seat. WHAT KIND OF SALESPERSON PAWNS OFF A SHITASS WEIRD TOILET SEAT ONTO A GULLIBLE ASIAN MAN?! A dick of course! Now I’m stuck with it too. I seriously think he expected me to not notice it, or not care, or think it was cool, dude, I find double yolked eggs freaky, but this is even freakier!!
But now I also feel awkward and bad, and don’t want to tell him to return it anymore since he obviously liked the benefits of having a male toilet seat (I don’t even know or want to know what that entails…).
Just Another Woo Girl
P.s. The toilet seat looks like it fucking had a baby. It’s disgusting.
As a kid I had always said I don’t want to be a doctor when I grow up. I can confidently say now, that that was because of sheer stubbornness (which I still possess, not sure whether to say sadly, I suppose because I’ve just accepted it, perhaps embraced it…).
Anyway, this morning, my dad shared some of his story with me that he hadn’t before.
I’d always thought my dad was boastful and big-headed, I suppose he still is. He used to boast about how he became a doctor, at this specific dinner party that I remember. He spoke about his experiences in third person, which really, probably cemented this idea of him in my mind. I know that he came from extremely poor backgrounds in China, but I don’t think I appreciated the amount of work he put in to get where he was. He always emphasised, that he was one in five, or one in three, of third in three-hundred, to gain a highly sought after position, or win a scholarship, or fellowship, and I would think, wow, that’s so great, but not really understand how hard he worked.
So it turns out he didn’t start off his uni life in Medicine, I had never really thought about how he got to Australia, but it’s really hard to.
Anyway, so he told me, that his father was adamant in having his son pursue a career in medicine. But my dad, really liked technology, was really good, and wanted to study it. He sat an exam or course at College and when his dad found out, he got really angry. He started crying when telling me this, because he died last year from a heart attack, I didn’t know what to do. Don’t judge me. He decided to study technology anyway, against his fathers wishes I guess. Somehow he started to talk about science and studying science, so I’m not really sure what he studied, but now I think it must’ve been science. Anyway, so he moved away from the poor country town to study.
Oh wait, so he sat the exam for college, but he didn’t make it. So he was devastated. He had a newfound motivation to study harder, and I suppose he got into science.
Anyway, he moved into the city to go to university. He was the poorest kid, he wore the same clothes. And he said, the only thing he cared about was his health and his studies. And this reminded me of how he used to tell me that every morning, he’d get up at around 5am and run laps around the park. And now I knew why, because he could only care for himself in this aspect, every other aspect was out of his hands without money.
So he worked super hard, having great motivation. He didn’t speak Mandarin well, so it was hard to learn, so he had to learn a new language as well. He graduated top of his class. Something like that. He goes on to learn English so he can gain opportunities overseas. One of his friends had gotten the chance to go to America to study and do research, and he’d sent photos back, and he’d changed. All the students at the uni had good backgrounds, were rich.
I guess I do take things for granted.
So then things happen, he’s chosen to be sponsored to go to Australia for a research grant. His supervisor is an amazing guy who likes my dad heaps, and even goes on to pay for him to stay and do his Masters and PhD in Adelaide. I think he died of cancer, I’m not sure, but my dad loves him heaps, there’s a photo of him in the study, it’s black and white, and is always up wherever we move. Anyway, my dad does his PhD and finishes it, having written eight papers, unlike the usual two. Proud.
I guess all these things happened, and that’s why I got to be born, and that’s why we live in Australia. I once asked my dad recently why he didn’t choose to go to Sydney or something when he came to Australia, then we could’ve lived by the beach or something. And he said, we mightn’t even live in Australia right now, because the supervisor wouldn’t have liked me as much as his own did. Then I said I can’t imagine living in China, and he said, you wouldn’t even have been born.
Quite a profound thought that was.
I don’t know. He went onto say, it was because of his motivation that he succeeded. And made his father proud as well. He said, he does medicine to help people, not for the money.
People at his clinic said he went through patients the fastest, seeing the most patients each day. I used to link this thought to money, not that he met them as quickly as possible, but that you’d make quite a bit. But I realise that it’s because he wants to help as many people as possible each day, and also because he’s good at what he does.
Makes me see my dad in a new light.
Since he did so well in all his studies, he went on to study Medicine at Flinders University, I think, or the University of Adelaide… Not sure.
Another plus, he said he’s going to get the whole family an iPhone 5 before we go to America for a holiday. Yay!
Just Another Woo Girl