I thought something was funny but I won’t say what

I don’t usually hahahahaha in my posts but today I’ll make an exception because I’m feeling slightly spritely at this moment besides also feeling sluggish from lying in bed all day.  If I don’t say why I’m hahaha-ing is this post kind of pointless?  Probably, but I don’t care.  I had fillings and a clean at the dentist today, I got needles, and half my face was numb.  I think I should drink more water, and try to read my tutorial notes so I can start recording my procrastination and study habits that I was supposed to start on Monday.  However, I can’t because I’m behind on readings for psychology, and basically all my subjects and it’s only week three.  I dunno, this post just doesn’t feel like it’s the right time to bring in the hahaha’s, but it’s been done and undoing it seems kind of, redundant.  I don’t know why I chose the word redundant, but hopefully you can assign some sort of understanding to what I actually mean by it, because I have no idea, and I’ll just agree that that is actually what I mean.  Maybe I meant what you mean but I didn’t even know it.  I have a bunch of lecture slides, notes and exercise notifications sitting in the printer downstairs.  Downstairs being the word of importance.  I feel like I want to just dance around my room so I can use some of this pent up energy (and not to mention unused calories) but I’m just not feeling it, I don’t have any music in mind.  Also to that, I have to update my iTunes because I’ve been listening to Halcyon by Ellie Goulding non-stop, with intermittent Katy and Marina and the Diamonds, and every so often just repeating some Miley because I only have two songs off her new album on my iTunes right now.  This is quite devastating.  So many readings to catch up on.  Today I was supposed to catch up on everything.  Oh my god, and I still have a brain and behaviour lecture to catch up on that I keep forgetting I’ve even missed.  How does one become organised???  Should I use my diary??  I think the answer is yes.  Okay, let me start using my forty dollar diary more thoroughly like I had in the past.  Oh my god, and also, where the hell are my really nice binders I used for school?  I had a mint fabric covered one and a gold metallic fabric covered one, both of which, were so nice.  I want to use those folders to start filing my notes in rather than these flimsy cardboard ones.  I mean, they’re nicely coloured, but the feel and touch of cardboard makes me sort of cringe.  I know, petty reasons, but…  No buts!!  But I’ll still but…  Anyway, I don’t even know.  Just so many funny things right now.  Not right now, but what I’ve discovered.  It’s kind of hilarious.  And also, I don’t know.  I was just thinking about love, and when I say love, I basically just mean romance in general.  It can be so, different, there are so many things that could happen, so many ways actual love can come to be or come to realise itself.  There’s no way of saying which one is the best and which one is the most long lasting, it just depends, on the people, the person, the everything surrounding the love.  Oh wow that last part sounded lame.  But I won’t delete it, because I feel like this post is a rant post.  Not for anyone else, just for me.  To vent things, just to type and think, but not ponder, okay, maybe ponder, but to not dwell.  I think sometimes, well a lot of the times (The Office) I dwell on thoughts.  And sometimes, when I’m reading about psychology I think, oh no, do I have a mental disorder?  Am I over thinking to the point where I could be classified under some sort of anxiety or depressive disorder (my inability to even name one actual disorder shows a vast gap in my understanding and my study of psychology, or if there even is a gap, maybe just an empty space, much like an abyss of nothingness.  Yes, I think that could be closer).  Oh my god, this whole last part seems a lot like dwelling.  Okay, let me move on.  I need to invest in some hand cream, a nice compact hand cream I can carry in my bag.  My hands are so dry right now, just, it’s uncomfortable.  I feel like my blog is very mundane and it’s often just talking about how I suck and venting stuff, but I do have lots of fun as well in my life.  I was about to add to the end of that sentence, “I suppose,” but I do!  I don’t know, I don’t blog about it because I feel as though the good things, are so ephemeral.  I just love that word.  And what I mean by that is what everyone always says, that kind of cliche saying, I don’t even remember the saying.  Just the one that says that you always remember the bad things more than the good things, especially when it comes to compliments and put downs, but I feel this a lot and also more in reference to the bad feels.  Yes, feels.  They’re not bad, well they are, but I mean nothing about death and things.  Just things that make you kind of anxious are the things you tend to think about the most.  And I think, that you have kind of a limit to the things you can think about all at the same time.  And if you’re thinking about something negative, and you keep thinking about negative things, you overtime squeeze out the positive and happy thoughts from your mind.  Not on purpose, just by habit.  I guess that’s why they say think positive, be optimistic.  Because once you hold onto something negative, your whole attitude is infected, and your mind becomes diseased.  At this point, just try your hardest to be positive, fake it till you make it, before it becomes epidemic.  But then at the same time I think that if you fake it you could also end up repressing feelings that you need to let go of, I guess it really depends on what exactly you’re dwelling upon…

Yes so anyway, tomorrow is a new day.  I don’t know why I say things like this, but it is.  You already knew that.  I don’t know.  I don’t know anything.  So funny though, I look in the mirror and I say to myself, “Oh my god pizza face” and laugh.  And then I’m like, “No!  Positive thinking!!  You look nice, me… Lol.”  Yeah I also say lol in my head, it’s kind of pathetic and not an attractive trait.  But you know, I used to “oh em gee,” and I also do that again, sometimes?

Cya,
Just Another Woo Girl

P.s.  These are basically the hashtags which made me laugh and want to blog about it, this is as vague and as specific as I can be, and now, I silently laugh through weird puffing sounds #wordpress #discoverme

P.p.s.  I guess this is also the first time I use hashtags in my post.  Wow, great day for firsts.  I’m going to read some of this blog now.

I met Harry Styles in the most amazing dream…again

So I haven’t blogged in a while seeing as I’m extremely busy not studying for exams…  So today I had my first exam for anthropology, which as you know, I’ll probably have failed anyway, and did today.  And last night, I was up till around one am just…looking at really vague revision slides that the lecturer made for the last week.  Kinda helped and kinda didn’t, but turns out, I should give myself a bit more credit, some stuff I did listen to in tutorials did come in handy.  So with an early wake up call at 6:30am that I left till 7am (good job me) I feel asleep exhausted, and went to gain an eventful and blissfully euphoric six hours sleep…

And the dreaming begins…

Much alike any other dream I’ve had, this specific section was dreamt just before I woke up from a pressed bladder.  Anyway, rather than beginning with how amazing and overwhelmed I felt in my dream and when I woke up, I’ll try to begin by recounting this epic love story…

So I was in the shopping centre, not sure which one, and I was with a friend, also not sure who.  Actually I think it might’ve been my sister…  Anyway, we are in the middle of turning the corner to go down the escalator when from the corner of my eye, I see this curly haired cute boy with hipster glasses on.  I’m like, oh my god, is that who I think it is?  I look at him, and he looks back at me.  I look at him half quizzically and he turns back to whatever he’s doing and is trying to be inconspicuous.  I’m not quite sure, I think I say to my sister something like, “Oh my god, I think that’s Harry Styles over there…!!!”  It’s my last chance, as we turn and walk down I call out, “HARRY!!”  He turns and looks up at me!  It is him!!  It’s Harry Styles!!  His effortless bespectacled disguise cannot fool me!  My life flashes before my eyes (okay well this is just author exaggeration, it could’ve happened!).  He shoots me this look as if he’s saying, “Come now if you want to meet me!  Before everyone realises it’s me and crowds me…”, his eyebrows raised, eyes wide and neck jerked slightly forward.  So of course, I make my way hurriedly back to him!!

I’m somewhat swoop up to him and we embrace!  It’s warm and longing, and my arms loop under his arms, around the back of his chest, hugging him so tight!  (Wow, sorry, I feel really lame writing like a fanfiction, but to be fair, this is a real dream I had last night!)  I say something like, “I love you so much!  This is the most amazing moment of my life!!”  Something really cheesy like that, that he hears all the time.  But to be honest, I don’t think I even care.  I am euphoric, my heart is racing, it feels like it’s going to burst from my chest and I can’t stop smiling!!!

I had always thought about what I would say if I met Harry, and the others boys too, trying to think of something memorable, cool and interesting!  But then I realise, that the only reason why I’d want to say something like that is so I can spark up some sort of friendship, when in reality, it will never happen.  But then I tell myself again, you have to believe if you want to achieve!  Be positive and optimistic!  (Or it could be contrarily construed as naive and wishful).

Anyway, back to the dream!  In my dream, Harry was wearing a thin white tee with some sort of black calligraphic drawing on it…so loose yet form fitting, caressing his sexy body.  (Ultimate fanfiction moment).  He says something back to me like, “I love you too.”  I don’t know, I don’t remember what he said to me in my dream, but I’m going to make myself believe it was something as amazing as that and that it really did happen (in my dream I mean, I suppose I could also be delusional and make myself believe it happened in real life, but that’s just crazy).
I’m not sure what even happens, but then some people he knows or I know, or maybe even randoms come up to us (while we’re having an intimate moment) and basically I end up taking a few pictures of Harry and some fans or friends.  I’m handing him his phone or something and we’re standing close…and then I wake up.

Oh lord, when I woke up, it was 6:18am.  I was smiling so much my cheeks hurt!  The dream was so amazing, and incredible, and fabulously intimate I felt as though my heart would burst out of love!  Yet at the same time, I felt so incredibly sad that this may never happen, and I will never even get to experience this utterly epic sensation, it’s unforgettable…  So basically, an overwhelming overload of euphoria and melancholy, as I have described many dreams and moments before…  Oh life.  What a hand you’ve dealt me.  What an amazing dream.  I wonder what will happen the next time I dream about Harry…just wondering makes me smile.

All my love,
Just Another Woo Girl

Don’t try and tell me you don’t want to see what it would be like to grow old with me

YOU’RE IN LOVE EVERY OTHER DAY COS YOU SMILE AT ME LIKE YOU’RE DYING TO SAY THAT YOUR HEARTBEAT STOPS WHEN I’M WALKING AWAY SO DON’T WALK AWAY – YOU’RE IN LOVE!
Imagine drinking wine incessantly and you’ll be kissing me on New Years Eve…
I’m listening to You’re In Love by Betty Who thanks to Tyler Oakley!  It’s been stuck in my head all day but for some reason I’ve got to listen to it on SoundCloud because shitty iTunes won’t let me put it on my phone without syncing…  It’s such an eighties sound and I love it.
Anyway, I literally can’t find any fucking articles on Google Scholar for my substitute sociology assignment and it’s really getting me frustrated and angry!  My breathing is stressed even while I’m typing this!  I’m using all the relevant key words but nothing good comes up!  I’ve got two articles which are alright…
I’m sitting in the law library and when I walked in, it was so quiet.  It was scary.  My friend even wanted to go into the Cone of Silence, the ‘quiet study area’.  I’ve read all the confessions and spotted things on facebook and people get dirties for turning a page too loudly, and breathing.  No way was I going in there.  My friend had described this such phenomenon to me before, and she said that during the day time the sun shone directly from above the cone (there’s like a massive sun roof) and it’s as if there’s a godly beam of light streaming down that should be accompanied by an “Ahhhhhhhh!”
Anyway, I should get back to studying again seeing as this is my substitute assignment.  I was at my sociology lecture today with Salvatore, he is the greatest lecturer ever because he is so kind!!  Everyone says that sociology is really easy, and I can’t really say because I haven’t done the work, but the real reason why it’s so easy is because of Salvatore!  He is so kind and sympathetic!  Basically the exam is multiple choice and really simple and straightforward, unlike the psych exam which is full of tricks.  And the lowest mark you can get is 40/100!  Even if you get zero you’ll still get 40% because he says, that even in an essay, if you actually attempt it properly but it’s crap you won’t get under 40.  Only if it’s not a real attempt will you get under!  So that makes me feel a whole lot better!  So great!  But kind of annoying some two guys behind me kept remarking how they were getting HDs and how Salvatore was nice.  Just shut up, or learn how to whisper.  You know you’re doing it right when no one else can hear you.  And obviously they were doing it wrong.
My friend was like, what are you doing? (while I was typing).  I said, “writing in my blog.”  She like, “Oh, that’s why you were typing so fast.”  I don’t think I could ever even imagine myself typing so fast when writing an essay.   Eugh, even thinking about writing an essay in an exam is giving me anxiety!  I literally know nothing about anything.  Life.
Oh my god Game of Thrones last night.  Fuck, it was crazy!  But so perfect.  The credits with the silence, godly.  We were discussing it, as you do, and basically I was like to my friends, don’t tell me, no spoilers!  And they continued to talk about it ‘without spoilers’ but they spoiled it.  I never want to talk about Game of Thrones with anyone it fucking ruins everything.  And then they try to take the spoiler back, but they can’t.  Eughhh!!!!  Erks me man.
Also, I was gonna watch Gatsby with my old tutoring class but now they’ve all seen it, and I don’t really want to watch it by myself (technically not true).  Life.  Oh life.
I can’t do uni.  Mehhhhhhhhhhhh.
Cya,
Just Another Woo Girl

I am never painting my nails during the day ever again

So just wanted to let you all know that I am never painting my nails ever again during the day.  Ever.  Usually I do my nails at night before bed because otherwise it hinders me from doing other things during the day, but then my room always smells of poison during the night, not that I really notice…  But for some reason, some stupid reason, I decided to paint my nails in the middle of the day.  Well the reason is procrastination (not that it can really even count as a reason).  So instead of writing my essays, I sat and watched spongebob on my computer whilst doing my nails.  
For some reason there’s this massive hype right now, I keep seeing memes about it, of how cool and awesome Spongebob is as a cartoon, and that it should be for adults.  I love how when you watch old children’s shows as an older person-
Oh my god stop right there.  I am an adult.  I am eighteen.  I am an adult.  Holy crap!  This is so weird!!!!!!!  This is the first time I’ve thought of or called myself an adult!!!  Well I actually didn’t call myself one because as I was thinking and typing it in my head it didn’t sound right…  I usually refer or categorise myself as a teenager, because I still am a teenager…  Wow!  I’m an adult!  Not sure whether when I turn nineteen next year that I’ll call myself an adult or still a teenager.  Maybe save adult for when I’m twenty.
Anyway, when you watch kids shows when you’re older there are so many things you don’t pick up on that you do now, like sexual innuendo.  It really makes me think what the writers are thinking when they write stuff like that…  Is it apart of how you make a children’s show?  You have to put sexual things in that they won’t get as some sort of underlying meaning and when they’re older they feel comfortable with sex?  I don’t know.  Well I thought Spongebob had some…  I watched the first few episodes a few weeks ago and didn’t think it lived up to it’s hype.  But now, after a few episodes in I feel like it’s heaps better!  I really like it.  Was never that into Spongebob when I was little anyway.
It’s kind of weird thinking that Spongebob is old, but he is so cute!  He acts like a little kid in the show.  But then Squid-ward is actually like an old man, older man…  So there’s this weird uncle-child relationship…  I don’t know.  Pearl is just weird.  Creeps me out.
So yeah basically painting my nails in the middle of the day has basically made my entire day revolve around painting my nails.  They don’t dry quickly since I’m not using OPI and so I have to be careful.  Then I think they’ve dried, literally six hours later, but they haven’t.  I accidentally scratch like a hole in the middle and have to fill it.  Then I’m in the shower and it moves off the nail and feels like rubber.  And now I’ve had to remove two of my nail polished nails and redo before I sleep because obviously, that is the optimal time.  
There’s literally nothing to eat at home.  I saw Maxim icecreams in the freezer every time I opened the fridge but wanted to save it for later.  I was nagging my mum that I wanted icecream and I suppose she or my family friends mum bought it.  And then tonight, I was like, now’s the time, the perfect time, there is no other time before until this time, to eat chocolate coated vanilla ice-cream!  I was so excited.  And then, to my complete horror, it was gone.  All gone.  The box is gone.  Just an empty space left behind.  Fml.  Now I’m eating some seaweed crackers, fuck.
Teen-life,
Just Another Woo Girl

The Wanted is here and I am also here, but not with them

It’s kind of really depressing thinking about this…  I’d always thought, one day, it’s inevitable that I’ll finally get to meet all the boys of One Direction, and The Wanted again, forming unforgettable and everlasting memories and possibly friendships with them all.  This, mostly to comfort myself after they’ve visited Sydney and I didn’t meet them, or create the everlasting friendship that I suppose all fans wish to make, some sort of corny instant connection…  It makes me so sad that no one will follow them around with me in this attempt.  
But then it also seems to me that if I were a big enough, crazed enough fan, I’d just go by myself.  But I wouldn’t, and I don’t really want to.  But then I think, I do want to, I should go anyway.
What I’m really getting at is that The Wanted are in Sydney right now, they are here, in my city, roaming around, being amazing, and I’m always somewhere else.  I’m in the city, maybe only kilometres away but I’m not with them.  I can’t see them.  What is life when it is lived without the things you love?  I feel like there are all these infinite opportunities that I’m cowering away from, all these things I want to do but am just not proactive enough to fulfil.  I’m referring specifically and only to meeting these amazing musicians I am crazy fans of.  
I wanted to wait for Ed Sheeran outside the backstage door, but no one would come with me.  Seriously, fuck.  It’s literally what people do after concerts, musicals, and everything, to take photos of them, or with them, or simply wave at them getting into their cars to leave the venue.  Oh life, what a hand you’ve dealt me.  Is there any career I can pursue apart from fame to become apart of this world?
My sister is 27 now and she’s never met the Backstreet Boys.  I wonder if I’ll ever meet One Direction.  This makes my heart want to burst into tears and drown my room…  I suppose she doesn’t particularly want to anymore, but they are going on tour again!  I don’t think to Australia though…
Ah my psychology essay which I still haven’t finished.  You know it’s two weeks late now, that’s twenty marks…  And that’s my life.  I’ve still got to write about another 250 words, and I’m not in the zone, I don’t remember what I’m arguing or what I’m really talking about anymore. Life sucks.
I wish I was just travelling around as The Wanted’s or One Direction’s stage manager or something, I don’t even care, toilet cleaner, tour bus aerator, I don’t know.  
I wanted to go out to a friends birthday on Saturday but now I don’t think I can since I’ve actually been offered a job and start on Sunday at 9am…  I want to be fresh for my first day yet, I just want to have fun…  I think if my friend wants to go then I’ll go, and then leave a bit earlier if it’s not that great, and if it is, just suck it up the next day and have a red bull.  But if not, then on the bright side, I’ll be making some money for future fun times…  I’m working for four hours, so I’ll be making like forty I think…  I don’t even know.
It’s almost midnight, it’s almost Wednesday.  In a few more hours after that The Wanted, Jay my most loved, will be on Sunrise in Martin Place and I won’t be.  Most likely I’ll be in bed.  But the thing is, I could actually be there, physically.  I don’t start classes until 2pm which leaves me a massive amount of time.  I love them so much.  From the first time to the day I die, it will be them (and One Direction).  They can bicker, but I still love them both.  Love is real.  This love is real.
What am I even doing with my life.  I feel like I’m not doing anything worthwhile, my studies are merely an action I repeat.  I’m not even diligent in that.  Sigh pie.  So annoyed my tea isn’t hot anymore otherwise I’d drink it through a Tim Tam.
You know what, I don’t even have a gift for the boys so I kind of feel bad, well I feel inadequate.  I wish they were having a concert.  I love them so much.  I love their music, and their personalities, they are incredible.  Poor Nathan, he’s still suffering from his sickness and didn’t get to perform tonight, or for ages.  I hope he gets better.  All my love.
I’m tired now…
Sleepy,
Just Another Woo Girl

Lunch date at Moo Burgers!

Yesterday I kind of, most probably, had the best Moo Burger experience of my life!  Seriously delicious and I hope you all drool with envy over this feast…  So many FEELS!
ImageYummy and delicious Moo burgers!  From top left: Cheese Moo, bucket of onion rings, haloumi burger, and my own Big Moo!  Plus strawberry milkshake and Fanta, with the cutest cow print straws!
Image
Close up of my Big Moo!  Egg, beef patty, extra pineapple!, beetroot, caramelised onions, tomato, lettuce, cabbage? and home-made mayo!  Seriously, I wish that was in my mouth right now…!!
ImageThe Aftermath: my friend top left was annihilated. 
Well hope you enjoyed this lunch series, because, fuck, I wish that was me again, everyday…
Strive for food excellence,
Just Another Woo Girl
P.s. This was at Moo Burgers Newtown!  They also have restaurants in Coogee, which I always go to when I’m at the beach!  And other places, I think Manly, Bondi…

Ed Sheeran in my dreams

This morning I had the pleasure of waking up feeling fresh and ready at the bright and early hour of 7am!  Instead, I went back to sleep and had yet another turbulent dream that always seems to happen when I oversleep…  And this time, it was about Ed Sheeran.  My love, my life, my only.

Ed has appeared in my dreams many a time actually, and once, we had coitus (lol).  Anyway, this time, was simply amazing.  I was at a concert of his.  I think it was exclusive or something because there weren’t many people there, maybe like two to three rows deep of people.  I was there with my uni friends, having an amazing time being so close to the sexy and amazing Ed!  I loved every minute of the actual concert I went to, and enjoyed it all the more in my dream.


But then something happened, and my uni friends had to leave for some emergency.  It was night time, I selfishly decided to stay and watch Ed.  Selfishly, because I think it was some sort of emergency, and I remember distinctly in my dream feeling guilty but then going back anyway.  So they left.  The exit to the concert hall was a shopping centre.


I walked back in, happily, and was approaching close to the stage and then Ed reaches his hand out to me and I grab it and he PULLS ME ONTO THE STAGE WITH HIM!  AHHHH FANGIRL ALL THE WAY SERIOUSLY IT WAS CRAZY IN MY DREAM!!! My heart is pounding, racing, and I can feel the smile from all the way inside my stomach, it was pure euphoria!!  I thought he was going to ask me to sing along with him for one of his songs, which would’ve been perfect, because then he’d realise I could actually sing which apparently is rare at a concert*.  That could be me!  In my mind, which was racing, I was imagining Ed being my mentor, and loving him for my eternal life.  He handed me a mic, and I was so excited to sing for him, then, he asks me to rap.


Rap?!  He starts playing a rap song, I’m not sure if it’s his, and I don’t know it!  I’m so embarrassed that he’s pulled me up on stage, as one of his biggest fans and I didn’t know the words to this rap!  Anyway, I start rapping, fumbling around for words I don’t know, and Ed’s next to me, encouraging me!  And then he takes me back off stage into the mosh pit.


Anyway, the concerts over now.  I go outside to see if I can meet my friends, I call one of them, and ask them where they are, but they’ve already left.  They’d caught a bus home…  So I go to our locker, and sure enough, everything is gone.  I think my bag is gone as well, but I don’t know, I wasn’t that worried, or I mightn’t even had had a bag…  So I go back inside.  Everyone’s walking out, and Ed’s walking around the theatre seating meeting the fans, but they’re all gone.  Yeah, somehow the seating changed from mosh, to red velvety theatre seats.


I go up to him and say, “Hi Ed!  You were amazing!  Can I get a picture with you?”  Ecstatically, we hug and I turn around in one swift motion and pass my phone to this guy with red hair, and he takes a picture for us!  I have my arms around Ed’s shoulders and his arm is around my waist, and it’s the most amazing moment ever!!  We are really friendly, I don’t run out of things to say, it’s all smooth and great!  I feel like I may have kissed him on the cheek it was so amazing.  Then we hug again, but this time super tightly, like swaying side to side, and being all besties!  But then I think I take the hug too far and we basically fall over the chairs (as you know theatre seats are super steep) all the way down to the bottom, with me landing on top of him, we’re still hugging.  This is not in the romantic way that you think.  It was so awkward!  Because I was the one who started making the hug really strong and swaying a lot!  Anyway, his face is kinda like saying, this is awkward, and what the fuck.  So I say goodbye, and I love you and all that, you’re amazing, etc.  And he smiles and says good bye as well, and I walk off, in euphoria!  Forget about the awkward moment where I tackle him, I JUST MET ED AND IT WAS AMAZING!!!  The conversation was amazing, he was amazing, there was definitely an awesome connection.


I feel like I would’ve given him my twitter, but I don’t know.  It was the perfect experience meeting one of your favourite singers!  Everything I’d dreamed it would be!!  Ed is so incredible!  I love him so much.  And this was the best Ed dream yet!  It was way more intense than the sex one!


Sweet dreams!

Just Another Woo Girl

*I watched this video on youtube of Michael Buble getting a birthday boy to come on stage to sing with him, and he was like crazy surprised that the boy could sing!

Smash: The Producers

What Karen is doing to Jimmy makes me so sad!  I just want to rip out my heart and let the tears gush from my soul…  She begged him to open up to her, that she couldn’t be with him if he didn’t tell her the truth about his past.  And when he finally did, when he finally opened his soul to her, opened up a part of him that he wanted to forget and leave behind him, she runs away in disgust.  She is so cruel to him now; Jimmy hasn’t hurt her in any way.  The only reason she doesn’t like him anymore is because of his past.  A person who he was no longer, and didn’t want to be.  She pushed him away because of someone he was, and now who he is, is recoiling back to someone he was, who he doesn’t want to be.

She’s cut him off completely, ignoring his existence, there’s no compassion, no empathy.  He’s hurting, his heart was twisted and squashed by her.  The only person he opens up to, is the one who rejects him.  He took the risk she wanted him to, that she asked him to, and she left.
Jimmy was trying to protect his closest friend Kyle, and for that, he is punished.  I know Kyle has been there for him, supporting him, helping and saving him from himself when he was at his worst.  But now that he’s relapsed, he is a lost cause.  Karen made Kyle turn away and leave Jimmy in a downward spiral. 
I get what he meant when he said to Jimmy that he has to help himself, that he can’t be there as his backbone anymore.  Kyle was his safety blanket, someone he could trust to help and protect him when he needed him.  It seems as though, Kyle has separated his friendship with Jimmy from Hit List.  Jimmy doesn’t understand this, he feels as though Kyle is putting himself and the show ahead of their friendship.
Karen tells Kyle to leave him, to end their friendship right at that moment, because if he waits he will lose his courage.  What he is losing by ending it right then and there, isn’t his courage, it’s his rationality.  If Jimmy is in a downward spiral, which he is, I guess Jimmy needs to realise this himself before his friends can help.  But now he has no friends.  If in time he gets on his feet, he will have to put away his pride to ask his friends for their help, or even their friendship.
What is the right thing to do in situation?  I wouldn’t leave Jimmy.  But then again, Kyle has helped him out through so many things, and so many downfalls.  Is it that the right thing to do is to leave Jimmy alone, to let him hit rock bottom and for himself to realise he needs to change.  Or is the right thing to do, is to stay with Jimmy, keep on trying, even if it’s hurting you?
I think maybe Kyle is right to have left Jimmy, but to have let Jimmy know he will always be there for him, but for now, he just can’t handle it all.  And that when Jimmy is ready, Kyle will be there waiting.  But what if Jimmy shows up the next day saying he’s changed but hasn’t.  It seems like the only thing Jimmy can do is to make an entirely new life for himself, with new people, in order to change.
But he’s gone back to his old life.  How will he escape this time?  If Jimmy goes back to dealing drugs, there’s no one to save him.  Kyle’s not here anymore.  He saved him the last time, but this time it’s different, because it’s the same.
Jimmy…
Smash is amazing and I love all the original songs for Hit List, and Bombshell.  I love them both so much, I love Jimmy, and I loved Jimmy and Karen together.  I love Ivy’s new independent persona, she is amazing, she is an amazing Marilyn.  Is Kyle going to die?  Right before he gets hit, I was feeling all the empathy for Jimmy, left out in the cold.  But if Kyle dies, what will this do to Jimmy?
Hit List reminds me of Spring Awakening.  I love Spring Awakening.  I wish someone would take Hit List to Broadway.  Sam isn’t right for the role of Jesse.  Jesse is innately Jimmy.  Jimmy is Jesse.  Don’t Let Me Know, is written by Jesse in Hit List, and was written and sung by Jimmy.  “You won’t pull me close, but you can’t let go,” is exactly how Jimmy feels about Karen.  He wouldn’t open up to Karen, but he still wanted to be with her.  She was the one.  But now, it’s changed, Karen won’t be close with Jimmy, won’t share his secrets, and love him for them, not simply despite them. 
I just want them to love each other, and be together, no matter what.  Just makes me sad.  Oh Jimmy…
Extremely melancholing-ly,
Just Another Woo Girl
P.s. Smash erks every sense in my body, every emotion, and I feel it compress against my chest and my soul.  The music, the lyrics, the story, the emotions, I can feel it all.  Amazing.

Touching Danny O’Donoghue at the Optus Rockcorps Concert

Oh my god.  What an amazing night.  A quick overview before I get to the most amazing part…  I dropped off my day late assignment at uni, looking quite toolish in my concert get-up.  We started lining up at around 5 and got in around 7:30.  Decided to stay in the mosh and basically, this is my first time moshing.  Even at Future Musical Festival there was a tonne of space to dance crazily in!  This was like being packed into a can of sardines, everyone dripping with sweat simply because our bodies were so packed together!  I mean, it wasn’t even hot inside, just everyone, so close…so much body heat…and body odour…

Anyway!  I physically couldn’t film any of the acts before The Script, so I sang along and watched in half discomfort of being swayed and almost falling down when I couldn’t get a foothold during movements, to Guy Sebastian, the Potbelleez (and their weird ass dancing), and Tinie Tempah!  Pretty sure I made eyes with his DJ a few times, sadly none that I recall with Tinie.  He was wearing sunnies the majority of the time…  Their dancing was cool.

Back to The Script!  By the time they came on, not sure when that was, I had made it to the front of the mosh pit!  Literally the front!  Literally the centre!!  I was behind two girls, and stood inbetween their heads, right in the centre, where they started to set up a platform and steps for Danny to walk on and interact with us fans!  Actually I was kind of annoyed, the girls in front of me didn’t even know his name was Danny…  Anyway, the second song they sang was We Cry, and he came down stage onto the steps and called out for us to sing into the mic!!  Sadly, he pointed it to the girl to my front left to sing…  I wish I had gotten the mic, it could’ve been an amazing bonding moment, maybe even life changing.  Ah the possibilities, and my imagination…

Oh what!  The first song they sang, Danny came right up and close to us, and he stood to the right of me for a bit, at first I couldn’t reach him, and all the girls behind me were pushing against me to try and touch him.  With a little extra effort I managed to touch, his, ARM!!!!  It was the closest thing.  I touched it, and then I went in again to squeeze it!!!  It was amazing!  So amazing.  I squeezed it, because when I touched it, it felt more like a brush up against, but squeezing, that was amazing, it was intense and I could really feel that it was him!!!  I squeezed Danny O’Donoghue’s arm, and I loved it.  Then he continued down.

Also, he sat down on the steps for a song, I think it was Man Who Can’t Be Moved, I love that song.  It makes me so emotional and sad, it’s a great song.  Anyway, he sat there singing, and instead of looking above me, and out to the crowd, like they usually do, he looked straight down at me!!!  I was singing all the words and feeling super emotional, probably making some un-attractive emotional singing face, and staring into his eyes!  I don’t feel weird staring into his eyes, because I want to have an amazing moment with him!  The girl on my front right got to hold his hand, I put my hand up while he was holding hers but he didn’t hold mine…  I guess that makes it more special, I mean, he can’t go around holding everyones hand!  But still wish it was me who got that single experience.

So that was the amazing Script.  God they are amazing, and gorgeous, and so sweet!

While we were lining up, I volunteered to be interviewed for some Foxtel show called, I don’t even remember anymore…  And then I volunteered for the Hot Hits Live from LA which was so cool!  I hope I get put on the website or whatever!  I mean my answers were pretty good!  Hopefully.  Fingers crossed!  We also got photos taken by photographers, I wonder where they will go up…  One of the photographers was actually hot, he had the Avicii hair, like the long on the top all tied up…  Some guys at my uni have that, I think I stared at them for too long, he really looked like Avicii…

Anyway, it was an amazing night and my fingers and calves are so tired!  No uni Fridays, woo!

Lots of Love from an amazing night with the amazing Danny O’Donoghue!
Just Another Woo Girl

P.s.  This is the rare occasion where I actually Woo!!  Best night ever.  Best. 🙂  (Rare smiley).

Uni update

Not really sure what I ended up on the last time I posted, but something about anthropology I suppose.  Anyway, it’s week four of uni and seriously, we’re already on our second strike.  Now usually in high school, I wouldn’t give a fuck, but now that it’s uni and I actually want what I’m paying for and want to learn something, it’s shit.  I miss out on the most important thing, tutorials!  Sigh pie 101.

Other than the strikes, anthropology is turning out to be the most mundane out of all the subjects I’ve chosen, only to be great in tutorials when I can just listen to my attractive tutor talk about stuff, and roll in some anecdotes and funny stories.  Well not to sound overly creepy, but I googled him and found out that he’s a dancer and composes music, which is so awesome!  I love music too.  But we probably differ in genres and tastes but whatever.  But but.

Sometimes I laugh or giggle to myself just because I know I’ve googled him and I know what he does in his spare time or what he previously did.  One time in class, well this week on Monday, I started laughing and looking down hoping he wouldn’t notice, but of course he did, and was like, “Why is she laughing?” Awkward cos I’m laughing at you, but not at you, as more as with you, or more so like loving laughter, as in, you’re so cute!  He’s like 30 I think.

After class he said, “You know it’s okay to laugh in class.”  Swoon bitches.  Wow this is turning into a slightly stalkerish recount of my tutor.

Anyway, had an anthropology lecture later that day, and he attended it, I think to gather notes on what to talk about, I’m not really sure.  Not sure if you know but tutors are mostly, are PHD students of that particular field.  And he made a joke the first time about being imprisoned in the Old teachers College where I suppose they do alot of their writing and stuff.

Anyway, people usually say hi to their teachers in high school, and a tutor is basically a teacher, and the lecturer is kind of like a distant figure who will never know my name because I will never (maybe I shouldn’t say never) become knowledgable enough in the field to be able to contribute so broadly in a lecture…  So for the first time I’m early to this lecture, I walk up to the other side of the hall and see my tutor, he see’s me, I look down, I look at him when I get closer in order to say hi, and then he looks down, and I say hi to no one.

Anyway!  Left this post open for too long whilst doing other stuff and have lost my train of thought.  Busy day ahead tomorrow, and a long night and uni the next morning!

Hope you are all enjoying your lives.
Just Another Woo Girl